Tuesday, October 7, 2008

...oNe oF mY gReAteSt feArS...

THIS...is my greatest fear...getting old...saggy..."falling apart". Shallow? Yes. More important things to worry about? Yes. Will I stop? No.

I do not consider myself exceptionally beautiful, but I look pretty good. I spend A LOT of time and money to look my best. I can not imagine how hard it will be to wake up one day and KNOW that I can't run from my age anymore. The thought of going to the beach and having people stare...NOT because I look sexy...but because I look wrinkled and ridiculous in a bikini...PAINS ME!I can not remember a time in my life when I did not fear growing old. I was depressed ALL DAY on my 30th birthday. Next year...I turn 40. I can't even imagine how I will feel then! I wonder why this is so scary to me. When did this happen?

The interesting part is that I feel sexier and I think I am more beautiful at almost 39 than I was at 20! I'm an improved womanly version of a girl that was a work in progress. But I still dread the day that heads no longer turn. Call me shallow, but at least I'm honest.

1 comment:

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