...caLLiNg pHoTo sHoP!...wE nEEd sOmE heLp hErE!...

So in my last post, I featured these SUPER cute Betsey Johnson swimsuits.  I never could find a good pic of the black and white one.  The model is so uber skinny and has such a long body, that it doesn't show just how sexy the suit is.  I REALLY want this suit...the problem is that the top is $118.00...yes...JUST the top...and the bottoms are $76.00.  That's mucho dinero for a freakin swimsuit!  So I decided to search online...

Unfortunately, when it's a "designer" item...it pretty much costs the same everywhere.  I came upon a site and clicked on the close up for the top.  I heard myself say "Ewwwww!!!!!"  I didn't notice it in the initial picture I posted last time...but close up...this girl needs a shave!  Click on the pic, and look at her armpit!

We live in a world where we are so warped because everywhere we look...there's airbrushed..."photo shopped"...visions of perfection!  Even knowing this...it's hard to ever feel good enough...at least for me...but seeing this picture today was a reminder that most of the time...when the "proofer" doesn't fall down on the job...it's all an illusion!

...i tHinK i hAd a bReAktHroUgH!...

I write about it ALL the time (especially on my other blog)...I've written about how I struggle to see the same reflection in the mirror that others see...about how I never feel like I look good enough. Needless to say, "swimsuit weather" gets me a little nervous. I start to worry about how I'll look on the beach and I pick myself apart and expect perfection. When people stare at the beach, I get really uncomfortable and anxious because I assume it's a BAD thing. Yep...can you say "issues"?

So anyway, today I was at the mall and these 2 bikinis caught my eye as I walked by...actually they didn't just catch my eye...they lassoed me and drug me over to them. They were so unusual...sooooo cute. I wanted to try them on but I was thinking, "Maybe this isn't such a good idea...what if they look 'bad' and then I'm all depressed and down on myself for the rest of the day?". Being the masochist that I am...I grabbed the 2 suits and went in to the fitting room.What happened next was really strange. I put one on...and I like it. I mean, I didn't JUST like the suit...I liked ME IN the suit! Hmmm....musta been a fluke or somethin...I put the other one on...that happened to be yellow...and was thinkin..."WOW! I look good!"...to borrow a phrase from stylist extraordinaire Rachel Zoe...I looked "BANANAS!" (that's a really good thing)




I liked THIS top with the bottoms below (wasn't feelin a skirt!Okay so the point of all this is NOT to brag or tell everyone how good I looked. It's not to prove that hard work pays off. It's to prove that maybe I can be cured of the way I've been towards myself in the past...okay and the present...maybe I CAN start to see myself the way everyone else does in the future. I think I had a little breakthrough today!

*and just for the record...I filled that suit out much better than that skinny minnie model on top! ;)