...MY "cOnFeSSioNs"...

Shopper...customer...client...buyer...browser...patron... consumer...all different words...with the same meaning..."one who visits stores in search of merchandise or bargains". I am all of these things. I LOVE to shop. I go through periods of time where it almost seems...compulsive...and then there have been a few periods of time where I hardly shopped at all. In fact, I remember calling my friend W at one point and asking "WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!? I DON'T EVEN WANT TO SHOP THESE DAYS!!!" As you can probably guess...the "compulsive shopper" is probably more of the "NORM" for me than the latter.

I have always been the type to look for bargains...even when I didn't NEED to financially. I would get such a rush out of buying a $118.00 shirt for $30.00 on clearance...and buying DESIGNER jeans...especially at FULL PRICE...was unthinkable to me...until I bought my first pair of Seven For All Mankind jeans with my sis. I asked for more and my husband bought me two more pair at $200.00 a piece for Christmas. So, one pair didn't fit right and I had to go back to try another size...they ordered me a size and in the end, I realized that apparently these jeans were cut differently than ALL THE OTHER Seven For All Mankind jeans and returned them and decided to look for another brand. True Religion jeans were too low and skinny and the Rock and Republic jeans I tried on are made for 6 foot tall models..not girls with a nice round butt and athletic thighs. I mean for $300.00...they should make my butt look better than ever instead of "smooshing" it flat.

I was at the mall returning these ill fitting jeans and shopping for my daughter's 13th b-day presents. I bought her the Ed Hardy tennis shoes she wanted and then decided to stop into The Buckle to check out their Ed Hardy tees. I saw ALL these FABULOUS jeans and I was sucked in! The super cute, edgy sales guy with the torn up jeans, the cool Affliction t shirt, and the "million dollar smile" bee-lined for me as soon as I walked in. I don't know if he could smell my weakness or if he was just really over zealous but he was RIGHT THERE. Our conversation was like this...

SALES GUY: HEY...(leaning back into a "swaggar" of a pose"...looking me up and down but not in a really obvious way)...LOOKIN FOR SOME JEANS?

ME: UH, YEAH...BUT I'M WONDERING DO THESE JEANS (holding up a pair I like) HAVE ANY STRETCH IN THEM...

SALES GUY: I THINK SO...MOST OF OUR JEANS DO...ARE YOU WANTING STRETCH?

ME: I NEED STRETCH OR I WON'T BE ABLE TO GET THEM OVER MY THIGHS. MY THIGHS ARE ATHLETIC AND BIG COMPARED TO MY WAIST.

SALES GUY: I TELL YOU WHAT...LET ME PICK SOME STUFF OUT FOR YOU...AND WE'LL SEE HOW YOU DO (charming smile)...WHAT SIZE DO YOU WEAR?

ME: 27...SOMETIMES 28 IF THEY RUN SMALL...

SALES GUY:  (turns to walk away and looks over his shoulder and asks...) DO YOU HAVE ANY "SINFUL" STUFF?

ME:  I BEG YOUR PARDON? (really "dumb blonde" look in my eye I'm sure)

SALES GUY:  THE BRAND..."SINFUL"...

ME:  OHHHH...NO.

He comes back with like 10 pair of expensive, SUPER CUTE jeans and 5 tshirts and I started trying them on.  Now there were NO MIRRORS in the dressing room, so I had to walk out to look in the mirror...feeling ON DISPLAY.  He was right there to give his opinion.  The tees he brought originally fit my middle fine but were VERY tight across the chest.  Hmmm...what a strange coincidence!  I asked him to get me some Mediums and he told me my jeans looked good...and I have to say...my butt WAS lookin pretty darn good if I do say so myself...ESPECIALLY for a woman that will be 40 this year!  I kept tryin and found some really cute stuff, but at $150.00 and $200.00 EACH...it's not like I could just grab everything I liked.  I narrowed it down to 1 "Sinful" tee and 3 pairs of jeans.  I get to the counter and the conversation continued...

ME:  "WELL, I GUESS I'LL TAKE THIS PAIR OF JEANS ($150.00) AND WAIT ON THE OTHER 2...AND I'LL GET THIS 1 TSHIRT FOR ME AND THIS ONE FOR MY DAUGHTER."

SALES GUY:  YOU SURE YOU DON'T WANT THESE OTHER TWO PAIRS OF JEANS???

ME:  OH, I WANT EM, BUT I'LL HAVE TO PICK EM UP LATER...I MEAN THAT'S 350.00 WORTH OF JEANS THERE!

SALES GUY:  PUT EM ON LAYAWAY IF YOU DON'T WANNA SPEND THAT MUCH RIGHT NOW.

ME:  LAYAWAY?!?  NO...I'M NOT A LAYAWAY KINDA GAL...(grimace...smile)

SALES GUY: (smile)  YOU CAN ALWAYS CANCEL IT...AND WE DON'T ALWAYS HAVE THESE STYLES...

ME:  FINE!

I walked out with hundreds of dollars of merchandise and hundreds more on LAYAWAY!  What the?!?!  I felt like I had just been involved in a Hit N Run accident.  I wasn't gonna go crazy..I just wanted 1 pair of jeans and a tee.  I think I even muttered, "What just happened?" as I walked out...but I KNEW..the same thing that ALWAYS happens.

So as usual..I tried to psycho analyze my decisions as I drove home drinking my yummy Sugar Free Strawberry/Vanilla Italian soda from Nordstrom.  Why do I go through these shopping cycles?  Am I happier in my life when I'm in the "NOT shopping so much" cycle?  When I compulsively shop am I trying to fill a proverbial "hole"?  Or am I just a spoiled brat?  Hmmmm...I think it may be a little of all of that.  I don't know...all I do know, is that I do LOVE to shop and I gotta STOP with the jeans!  I need to be more in control!  Sometimes, I think the ONLY way for me to be in control is to avoid stores altogether, because try as I might to "be good"...I AM A SHOP-A-HOLIC!

*BTW...just a little fashion "tid-bit"...the brand of jeans called Rock Revival that I bought at The Buckle...are actually made by Rock and Republic...the ONLY difference (besides actually being cuter in my opinion) is that they are cut for "more normal" people and instead of $300.00...they are $148.00.  So, if you like Rock and Republic jeans, check out Rock Revival jeans!